Somebody to Love Read online

Her loud cackling pierced my ear. “Girl, your awkward self ain’t sliding into anything. Stumble maybe.”

  Stinging tears filled my eyes before I could stop them. Who was I kidding? Like trying to stop them had ever worked.

  “Kirb?”

  “Yes?”

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—”

  “It’s fine. Ignore me.”

  She smacked her lips and I was pretty sure an eye roll wasn’t far behind. “I’ll do no such thing. You’re my bestie, I hurt your feelings, and I’m sorry. Forgive me?”

  I giggled through a fresh round of tears. “Yes.”

  “Yay. So, what was your news?”

  “Oh!” I sprang up on the bed, bouncing a bit. “It’s official. One month from now I will be a college student.”

  “Seriously? She said yes?”

  “Well, no. But Saige talked her into it.”

  “Thank god for sensible sisters.”

  “My sentiments exactly. There is one little problem though.”

  Esme’s line went silent for a moment. “What is it?”

  “Well, Saige only got Rai to agree by enrolling with me in all my classes.”

  “Wait, didn’t she already graduate…four years ago?”

  “Yup. I appreciate her help but it’s gonna be weird having her there. Not to mention it’s still very limiting in terms of freedom.”

  “Yeah…but at least you still get to go, even if you can’t live on campus.”

  “Yeah.” I sighed and flopped back again. Living at home had been the agreement upon my initial conversation with Raina. I could attend RCU, but not live in the dorms. ‘We only live twenty minutes from campus’ was Raina’s reasoning. It wasn’t about distance or convenience, which she knew, but the experience of college life. “Maybe next semester.”

  We talked for a while longer before I was called to dinner. Afterwards I headed outside to my treehouse. It had already sat nestled in the branches of a large oak when we moved in. Raina’s boyfriend at the time fixed it up for me and waterproofed it. Countless hours were spent here growing up. I’d always felt my safest tucked within its walls.

  Leaning out the window, I looked over the neighborhood. In all the years we’d lived in River Crest, I still hadn’t quite gotten used to it. Sure, they had a beach, but it was nothing compared to the ones back home. Searching the sand for sea shells with my mom or sitting on my dad’s shoulders while we played in the ocean.

  My heart constricted, causing me to fall back onto the bean bag I kept near the window. I lifted my fingers to my cheek, checking for tears I knew wouldn’t be there. On any other occasion they fell freely, but not this one. Never this one.

  With a heavy sigh, I shut the window then moved over to my reason for even coming up here. I checked the jigsaw puzzle to make sure it had dried then flipped it over, dated it, and began to apply acrylic to the back.

  Finished with that, I headed back to the house as the sun slowly disappeared behind the horizon. After showering, brushing my teeth, and tying down my hair, I began my nightly routine. I started with the basement, checking and double checking. With the bottom floors done, I moved on to the second floor which housed the bedrooms.

  I tapped Saige’s door lightly before I entered. She watched me through the vanity mirror as I went over to her window, lifted and inspected it before pushing it down again.

  It wasn’t until I finished my task that she smiled at me. “Good?”

  “Good.” I nodded then headed back out again.

  “Night, Kirby.”

  “Night.”

  Next was Raina’s room. Taking a deep breath, I mentally prepared myself before knocking.

  “What?”

  ‘“Can I come in?”

  Her pause was so long I feared she’s say no. “Fine but hurry it up.”

  I shuffled in, repeated the same process as I had on Saige’s window.

  Raina watched me with narrowed eyes over the rims of her glasses. Her long, raven locs were piled on top of her head in a bun, giving her slender neck an elongated appearance. Raina’s beauty reminded me of an Egyptian Goddess, despite the frown she wore constantly. Rarely did a smile soften her features.

  Hurrying by, I flashed a small smile. “All done.”

  Last, I did a quick but thorough sweep of my own room. Door open, check. Window open, check. Rope ladder, check.

  After one last mental run through, I climbed into bed, stopping to adjust the dreamcatcher hanging on the headboard. “Please work tonight.”

  Chapter Three

  ~ Haikeem ~

  My thoughts circled as I lay on the porch swing staring up at the gloomy sky. The smell of rain permeated the air. Only a matter of time before it started to fall. I made no motion to move, even though judging by the direction of the wind, I was likely to get soaked.

  I didn’t care.

  In fact, I didn’t care about much lately. The crew had been calling for a couple weeks, but I’d turned my phone off. When they rang the house, I denied their calls. When they’d shown up, I’d refused their company. Several of my robotics projects lay collecting dust and even though there were less than two weeks until I was supposed to move into my dorm, I’d yet to pack.

  Usually I’d be stoked about the start of the school year. This time around, I couldn’t muster an ounce of excitement. At times I wasn’t sure I wanted to go back. Return to the dorms where I became lost to myself, the world. Stroll across the campus where everything changed. Sit in the lecture halls where the old me died.

  How was I supposed to face all that knowing I’d never be that guy again? The old Haikeem faded away in those halls.

  “Keem?”

  I tipped my head back at the sound of my sister’s mousy voice.

  She stood near the front door, staring at me with her head cocked to the side. She was the spitting image of our mother. Mahogany skin, deep brown eyes, high cheek bones, and a head full of thick, brown curls. Savannah kept hers in a curly afro puff atop her head, while mom had hers locked two years ago and kept it dyed.

  Sitting up, I stretched my stiff legs out in front of me. “What’s up, kiddo?”

  Her eyes rolled to the top of her head as she came and sat beside me. “I’m not a kid. I’m fourteen.”

  I chuckled. “Okay, Savannah.”

  “Mommy sent me to get you for dinner.”

  “Not hungry.”

  She frowned. “But it’s taco night, your favorite.”

  My attention went back to the street where a light drizzle had begun. “Not really in the mood for tacos right now.”

  “Are you depressed?”

  I whipped toward her. “Why would you say that?”

  She shrugged. “Overheard Mommy and Daddy talking.”

  My brow lifted. “Overheard or eavesdropped?”

  She dropped her gaze, biting her lip to hide a smile.

  “Nosy behind.”

  “So…are you?”

  I fixed my mouth to deny it, but I’d promised her long ago that I would never lie to her. “Yeah, I am.”

  “Why?”

  “For reasons you wouldn’t understand.”

  Without looking I knew she was rolling her eyes at me again. “Should I hug you?”

  I glanced over and found her patiently awaiting my answer. Savannah was diagnosed with high functioning Autism before she reached kindergarten. Because of it, she had a hard time with social cues and other social situations. She also had a thing about touching. If you were outside of the select people she allowed to, she’d either shut down or have a panic attack. Beside that though, she was your typical teenager.

  “Yes.”

  She smiled then wrapped her arms around me from the side, giving me a tight squeeze. “I’ll tell Mommy you don’t want to eat right now, and I’ll put some of your favorite toppings to the side so Taylor doesn’t hog them all.”

  “Thanks, Banana.”

  That got another eye roll out of her before she got up and bounced h
er way back inside.

  I settled back again, watching the rain pour down in sheets now. The sound of it lulled me into a meditative state and my eyes drifted closed. Thoughts rolled around in my head, settling on the conversation I’d had with Baz a mere week before my life had changed.

  “What you need to do is give these shady ass broads a taste of their own medicine.”

  I looked up from my third drink and quirked a brow. “What are you talking about?”

  “They keep fuckin’ you over, right? They can’t do it if you beat ‘em to the punch. Your problem is you’re wasting your time trying to fall in love and shit when what you need to do is just have some fun. You’re in college man. Save that love shit for your thirties. Have a real drink, then go find you a fine ass broad, take her home, and fuck the shit out of her. Guarantee you’ll feel a helluva lot better in the morning.”

  I shook my head at him and took a sip from my Bahama Mama. “That’s not me.”

  “And that’s your damn problem. Let go of the Prince Charming act. They don’t want it, trust me. I’m an asshole and got more pussy than I can handle. They throw it at me, bruh.”

  “So, I’m supposed to be like you? Dogging women and treating them like objects?”

  “Nah, nobody can be like me. I’m fucking amazing. But what you don’t need to be is you. How far has it gotten you? You are a living example that the nice guy finishes last. But hey, keep doing what you’re doing. That is if you wanna continue to be a stepping stone for the next guy the rest of your life.”

  My eyes opened when someone sat down beside me. I glanced at my mom then closed my eyes again.

  She laid her hand on top of mine and gave it a gentle squeeze. “I’m worried about you, baby.”

  I said nothing.

  “You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

  A simple nod was all I gave.

  My eyes fluttered open but remained on the storm brewing ahead of me. There used to be a time I could do that, but things weren’t the same anymore.

  I sighed and stood. “I’m going for a walk.”

  She gave me a crazy look. “In the rain?”

  I shrugged then went inside, threw on a hoodie, and grabbed my umbrella.

  ~ ♥ ~

  Water sloshed under my boots as I walked aimlessly through the rain, paying no attention to where I was. The wind had picked up a while ago, allowing the rain to soak my pants from the knee down. The humidity warmed the air, so the wetness didn’t bother me much. It was making my jeans heavy though, so I turned and began my trudge back the other way.

  Catching movement across the street, I glanced in that direction. Standing in the yard directly across from me was a girl, head thrown back and arms outstretched. She was without any form of protective gear, just stood there letting the rain wash over her. It was pouring now, raining cats and dogs as people liked to say, and it didn’t seem to faze her one bit.

  Long, dark hair was glued to the sides of her face, and her clothes to a slim frame with subtle curves. She brought her head down, revealing a smile stretched across her small face and the world came to a screeching halt. Damn.

  A vice squeezed my heart and I had to clutch my chest and close my eyes. When I opened them again, she was facing away from me and a woman stood on the porch, scowling at her. Words I couldn’t hear were exchanged then the rain-soaked girl jogged up to the porch and disappeared inside.

  When my feet unglued themselves from my spot, I got moving, still rubbing at my chest and wondering where the unfamiliar jolt had come from. It didn’t really hurt, but I made a mental note to bring it up at my doctor’s visit next week before classes started.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket and I dug it out. I’d only turned it on in case my parents needed to call with an emergency or something.

  I opened the new text from Baz.

  Baz: We at Werk. Come thru.

  I tucked the device away without replying and trudged back home through the disgusting weather. The club was the last place I needed to be, but then again, maybe a drink and some company would do some good right about now.

  Chapter Four

  ~ Kirby ~

  You got this, girl. Just breathe. In. Out. In… Out! Out! Out! I pushed out a long breath and took a tentative step into my very first college class. Relax. It’s just a classroom. No different than high school. Perhaps that wasn’t a good comparison. High school for me was pretty much hell. My breaths became shallow upon recalling my years of torment from my peers. I started to take a step back, but someone rushed past, knocking me into Saige, who’d been waiting by the door.

  “My bad,” was the only form of apology I got as the guy continued forward and took a seat.

  After righting herself, Saige frowned at the rude and kind of cute boy then took a step toward him.

  I grabbed her arm. “Saige, no,” I begged. “Please don’t make a scene.”

  She faced me with her arms crossed. “Kirb, if you’re gonna make it in life you have to learn to stand up for yourself. If you don’t people will walk all over you.”

  “I know,” I said, hanging my head. “I just… I’ll try. I promise. Can we please just sit down?”

  “Fine,” she sighed.

  I shuffled over to a desk toward the back and sank down into the chair. Saige took the desk to the left of me and a few seconds later someone took the one to my right. I glanced over and was met with a dark-skinned boy with pretty eyes.

  He smiled at me.

  I faced forward, sinking further down in my desk. Maybe Raina was right. Maybe I couldn’t do this after all. I couldn’t even return a friendly smile to a stranger. I was weird, awkward, a puzzle piece in the wrong box. No matter how hard I tried or which way I turned, I’d never fit.

  Releasing a long sigh, I opened my bag and took out my English Composition book to prepare for class. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I jumped.

  The cute boy gave me a strange look.

  Discreetly, I pulled out my cell and checked my messages under the table. The text from Esme made me smile.

  Esme: You can do it! I believe in you!

  I smiled at her uncanny ability to know when I was in distress. She swore she was a psychic.

  Me: thanks!

  With her words of encouragement, I tucked my phone away and sat up straight, giving the professor my full attention.

  After going over the syllabus, she gave us our first assignment; a five-hundred-word descriptive essay about ourselves.

  I sat for the longest time, strumming my pencil on my chin and drawing a blank. A descriptive essay about me would probably be the most boring thing ever written. There was nothing of interest about Kirby Ashford. I’d lived a sheltered life since the age of nine. Didn’t go anywhere or do anything. College was my biggest adventure since leaving Barbados and only one had been a choice.

  My eyes started to burn. I closed them and counted to ten.

  I suppose I could write about my time in Barbados, that was if the teacher didn’t mind a paper soggy with tears. Sighing, I glanced over at Saige who was already well into her paper. I then snuck a peek at the guy beside me. His page was also filling up fast.

  Biting my lip, I stared down at my blank page. A second later an idea struck me. I sat forward and began highlighting my goals and aspirations, as well as my college expectations.

  At the end of the hour I turned in my paper and walked out of the class with a smile on my face. One down, four to go.

  ~ ♥ ~

  “Kirby. Kirby!”

  I jumped in my seat and turned to Esme. “Huh?”

  She laughed and shook her head. “Would you stop staring at the picture for five minutes so I can talk to you? I’m gonna take your phone.”

  “I can’t help it,” I whined then poked out my bottom lip. “He’s so cute.” I turned my attention back to the latest photo of Sexy Instagram guy AKA MrRoboto_812. His face filled most of the screen, giving me a close-up of his swoon worthy eyes. And that s
mile, my goodness.

  My phone was snatched from my hand and I turned and frowned at Esme. “Hey, give it back.” I reached for it, but she hid it behind her.

  “Why stare at a screen when you can see the real thing?”

  I stopped trying to get the phone and furrowed my brows at her. “What?”

  Instead replying, she turned and pointed across the cafeteria.

  When I looked up, my heart stopped. Three tables away, in the flesh, was what my fantasies were made of. Gosh, he looked even better in person, even from a distance. How was it possible for someone to be so freaking cute? But more importantly, what the heck was he doing here? Nowhere on his Instagram had it indicated he attended RCU.

  There were no school shirt and no pics of him on campus. Most of his posts consisted of romantic quotes or pics of him out around town. I’ll never forget the pic he posted months ago of him lying in bed. He’d captioned it ‘#Lonely Need someone to cuddle.’ He’d been shirtless. Though nothing more than his shoulders were exposed, there was a lot to imagine. Like him cuddling me and kissing me with those luscious lips.

  A long time had passed since that last post.

  He glanced in our direction and I ducked behind Esme.

  She turned and looked at me like I’d lost my mind. “What are you doing?”

  “He’s looking over here.”

  “And? It’s not like he knows you’ve been stalking him.”

  I peeked around her to make sure his gaze was elsewhere before sitting up straight then stuck my tongue out at her. “It’s not stalking. If he didn’t want his pictures to be looked at his account would be private.”

  “Yeah, well I’m sure he didn’t intend for them to be saved to someone else’s phone,” she said through a smile. “You should probably delete them before you two meet.”

  “Meet! Wha- why would- w-why…What?”

  She smiled and stood, taking my hand as she did. “Come on, I’ll introduce you.”

  “No!” I snatched my hand away and shook my head so fast I got whiplash.

  Sighing, she plopped back down. “Kirb, isn’t the whole point of this college experience to conquer your fears?”