Teach Me (College Daze Book 2) Read online

  Teach Me

  A College Daze Romance

  Danielle Burton

  Copyright © 2016 Kirby Danielle Burt

  All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used, reproduced, or transmitted in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the author except for the use of brief quotations used in a book review.

  For Deborah

  Table of Contents

  Intro

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Intro

  ~ Benji ~

  It was fully loaded. All I had to do was pull the trigger. End it. No one would miss me.

  Leaning back against the leather seat, I took a drag from my joint, and then checked the chamber for the tenth time. Six bullets, my name carved into each one. Which would meet its owner?

  Safety off. Safety on. Off.

  Turning to my left, I caught a glimpse of a man in the side view mirror of my car. Grayish blue, bloodshot eyes stared back at me. Wetness trailed from them, leaving streaks on his face.

  I looked at this man called Benjamin Creed and realized I had no idea who he was anymore…if I ever did. The man in the mirror was a stranger, so would pulling the trigger be suicide or murder?

  I sneered at him. The unloved. The abandoned. The fuck up. His face sickened me. Aiming the revolver at him, I thought back to the events that had brought me to this point...

  Chapter One

  ~ Benji ~

  “Hey, Benny. Do you remember me?” She fiddled with the button of her coat and stared up at me. Her dark brown eyes were clear for the first time I could recall and her mocha face was smooth and blemish free.

  I leaned against the counter with my arms crossed, fighting the urge to open the liquor cabinet and down a bottle of Jack. “My memory is just fine, Sasha. What the hell are you doing here?”

  She wrung her hands and stepped closer to me. “I came to pay my respects to my sister-in-law, and to see you of course.” She flashed me a smile and I was surprised to see that her teeth were straight and white.

  I simply stared at her, refusing to show any expression but stoic. “Yeah, because I’ve been such a huge priority in your life thus far.”

  “I know we haven’t had the best relationship, but I thought maybe we could try–”

  “Try what?” I pushed off the counter and stood in front of her. “Let me guess, you’re clean for the time being and you want to try to act like you give a damn about me? I haven’t seen you in five years, Sasha. Don’t walk in here and act like everything is fucking roses after all the shit you’ve done.”

  “Benny–”

  “Stop calling me that. It isn’t my name. Matter of fact, just leave. No one wants you here. I damn sure don’t. You should be the one dead, not her.”

  Tears filled her eyes and she took a step back. “You’re upset. I understand. My therapist said it would take some time for you to be able to forgive me or even speak to me.”

  Upset? Was she joking? “Well your therapist was wrong. No amount of time can ever make me forgive you.” She opened her mouth to speak again, and I slammed the side of my fist into the refrigerator door, leaving a dent. “Get the fuck outta here!”

  Once she was out of my sight I slid down to the floor and let my chin drop to my chest. No tears fell. I’d lost the ability to cry a long time ago. I suppose after countless nights of soaking my pillow as a child, my tear ducts had dried up.

  An unbearable heat wrapped itself around my heart and squeezed the muscle, making it impossible to breathe and sending a signal to my brain that it was long overdue for a release.

  I climbed to my feet and threw open the liquor cabinet, pushing the glass bottles around until I found my best friend. After taking a swig, I sat down at the kitchen table with a shot glass in front of me. The clear liquid burned its way down my throat, numbing the pain of my past just a bit, which wasn’t nearly enough.

  Shot after shot I downed, trying to stop my circling thoughts. Halfway through the bottle and the memories had yet to subside. Instead they continued to bubble to the surface, taunting me.

  The sound of the front door closing brought me back to the present and reminded me of the very important event I was supposed to be attending. My aunt’s funeral, or whatever the hell they were calling it. I turned my arm to glance at my watch, spilling vodka over the table. Shit. I shook my head as I watched it drip to the floor. What a waste.

  I sat up straight, preparing to refill my glass when I heard my name. And the prodigal son returns. I kept my attention on the task at hand, the last thing I needed right now was a reminder of how lousy my life was compared to his.

  Jayson Fucking Adams, born with a silver spoon in his mouth. Everything came easy for him. He wouldn’t know struggle if it smacked him in the face, which I often wanted to do when he complained about the nominal shit that happened in his life.

  I honestly had no idea what he’d said and couldn’t have cared less. I just wanted to be left alone. “Fuck off, Jay.”

  “After everything she did for you, stepping in as your mother when your own abandoned you. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.”

  I set my glass down a little too hard, spilling the precious contents over my hand, which further pissed me off, then stood and looked him in the eye. “I said, fuck off. I’m not in the mood for perfect Jayson and his perfect life.”

  “Perfect? My mother is dead. Our mother.”

  My fists clenched at my sides. I wasn’t sure why his presence was pissing me off so badly at this moment. There was a time when Jay was the only person in the world I trusted, when he was my best friend. But ever since his long lost love had returned he hadn’t had time for me anymore. She took precedence in his life, and I was once again alone.

  Sure Aunt Nicolette was kind to me, but she was that way to everyone. Uncle Kareem, on the other hand, was always hard on me. Shit Jay got away with, I never could. The fact of the matter was, I wasn’t their son, and no matter how much I’d wished for it, I never would be.

  I stared down at their golden boy and clenched my jaw. Even though I had two inches on him I’d always lived in his shadow, there was no escaping it. Lifting my hands, I gave him a forceful shove. “She was NOT my mother.” I thrust a finger toward my uncle who stood in the corner scowling at me. “He’s not my father.” I shoved him again. “And you,” shove. “Are not,” shove. “My brother!” I shoved him hard into the wall, wanting him for once to experience the pain I suffered with each sunrise and sunset.

  “After everything we’ve been through, this is how it’s gonna be?”

  His question was almost laughable. “That’s the thing Jay, you ain’t been through shit. The worst thing to happen in your life was your mom getti
ng sick, and even that didn’t happen to you, it happened to her. You’re still Mr. Perfect. Jay’s our star runner, let’s give him a full ride. Jay’s so smart, let’s put him on the Dean’s list. And to top it all off, let’s just throw in his dream girl for good measure.” I picked up my forgotten shot then threw it back and wiped my mouth on my shirt sleeve. “Don’t stand there and try to tell me what you’ve been through, because if we compare battle scars, I guarantee you, I’ll win.” I grabbed up the half empty bottle, my new best friend, and headed for the back door.

  “If you leave, I won’t come chasing after you this time.”

  I paused not bothering to turn around. His words didn’t surprise me. The only person he seemed concerned about lately was Gabi. “No one’s asking you to.”

  “I mean it, Benj. You walk out that door, I’m done. Don’t expect me to be there to catch you when you fall.”

  “I won’t.” I continued out the door, slamming it behind me. I didn’t need him. I didn’t need anyone. Benjamin Creed was fine on his own.

  Chapter Two

  ~ Camryn ~

  “Are you kidding me right now?” I glared at my mother’s reflection in the vanity as she piled on her makeup. Between concealing, contouring, and plucking, she didn’t even resemble herself by the time she finished. For as long as I could recall she’d done this. I barely remembered what her real face looked like.

  She continued what she was doing without so much as a glance in my direction. “Now, Cammie, you know me better than that. When do I ever joke, kid, or do anything in jest?”

  I could definitely attest to that, the only smiles I’d ever seen from her were phony. “Then why? Why would you stop paying my tuition?”

  “Please stop whining, Cammie. It’s unbecoming, and men don’t like little whiny women.”

  I rolled my eyes at her continued use of the name she knew I despised. I took a few deep breaths, trying to center myself. “Mother, why are you stopping my tuition? How am I supposed to finish school?”

  She sat down her tweezers and started in with her eyebrow pencil. I never understood the point of plucking out half your brows just to draw on new ones. “Did you even pass any of your classes last semester?”

  I opened then closed my mouth. Most of the last semester was a blur. I hadn’t meant to get behind on my classes, but between partying and man hunting, I’d sort of let them get away from me. I’d barely skated by on two of my classes, the rest… “That’s beside the point.”

  She let out a puff of air and eyed my reflection through one eye as she glued on her fake eye lashes. “Cammie, what did we agree on when I allowed you to register for college?”

  Squeezing my eyes shut, I mimicked her nasally voice and recited back what she had said to me. “Cammie, you have exactly one year to find Mr. Money Bags because I’m not taking care of you forever.” I tucked both my lips into my mouth and bit down on them to keep from laughing at the glare she was giving me. “I remember our agreement, Mother, but it hasn’t been a year and it’s the middle of the semester.”

  “I’m well aware of that.”

  “Then what the hell, Mom?”

  She sighed and sat down her lip liner. “The money is gone, Cammie.”

  I stood there for several minutes, attempting to pick my jaw up from the floor. “What do you mean it’s gone?”

  “Exactly what I said, Cammie.”

  Moving forward on numb legs, I stood beside her chair and looked at her instead of her reflection. “B-but, what happened to it? There should have been enough to cover four years, let alone one.”

  “I needed things.”

  “Things! What kind of things do you need that cost as much as college tuition?” I was fuming at this point. When I was born my father had started me a college fund. One my mother had access to, but only for the purpose of paying my college fees.

  She shrugged as if it was of little importance. “My Mercedes for one. I also had the kitchen redone.”

  “You bought a car with my tuition?” My voice echoed around the walls of her walk-in closet, which was twice the size of my dorm room. “And a kitchen? You don’t even cook.”

  She finished putting her tools away then stood. She was only two inches taller than my height of 5’2” but the five inch heels she wore made me feel like a dwarf. “I also hired a personal chef. Which reminds me, if you want something for dinner put in your order before five.”

  I was more than a little tempted to snatch the hair extensions from her head. It wouldn’t be the first time we’d fought physically, but I was trying to be a better person, especially in light of recent events. “How could you do this? You knew how much college meant to me.”

  Her back was to me as she pushed her clothes around, searching for an outfit. “You’re whining again.”

  I marched over and grabbed her shoulder, forcing her to look at me. “Stop acting like this isn’t a big deal. Are you purposely trying to sabotage my life? That money was for me and you know it. You’ve burned up every penny we have. Thank God I can’t touch my trust fund until I’m twenty-five or you’d have spent that too.”

  She dropped her gaze to the floor and tapped her long nails on her thigh.

  “You didn’t! How?” My question went unanswered and she continued to avoid eye contact. “You know what? I don’t even care. I’m so done with you.” I turned and started toward the door.

  “Maybe you’d have your own money by now if you’d done what I told you.”

  I froze at the door and turned around with my fists balled tight at my sides. “If I’d done what you told me, I’d be just like you. And frankly, I’d rather die.”

  I rushed from the house, calling a taxi as I walked, then sat down on the snow covered step to wait for it. I’d rather freeze to death than ever step foot in that house again.

  Tears burned my face before immediately chilling my skin as I sobbed in front of my childhood home. Something it hadn’t been since the day I woke to the news that my father wouldn’t be coming home, ever again.

  I muffled my cries in my coat sleeve, unable to pull myself together. “Why’d you leave me, Daddy?”

  Chapter Three

  ~ Benji ~

  I clenched my fist slowly, forcing myself to full consciousness. Fucking sleep paralysis. I’d suffered from it since adolescence, yet never failed to go into a panic whenever it happened. When my eyes opened, a sharp pain shot through my head, and I shut them again. The sun mixed with the bright snow had the equivalent of a UV light.

  Inch by inch I exposed myself to the blinding light while trying to ignore the hammering inside my skull. I turned the key that was still in my ignition just enough to power the clock. Seven a.m. Thoughts swam in my clouded head, none of which were cohesive enough to gauge where the hell I was and how I’d gotten here.

  I recalled getting into my car and driving off. Not too long after that the effects of my drinking binge had finally kicked it. It took much more than it used to for me to even get a buzz. A small part of my mind told me that was bad. A larger part told it to shut the fuck up.

  Judging by the line of nearly identical two story homes to my left, I hadn’t even made it out of my uncle’s neighborhood before I’d pulled over to prevent myself from killing someone. Besides me that is, I couldn’t give two fucks about him.

  A knock on my passenger window caused me to jump. The most I could see of the person was a navy blue fleece vest and a white hand.

  I rubbed my eyes and ran a palm over my face before letting the window down a crack.

  The pale face of a man came into view. His blue eyes observed me while he smiled bright. “Hey buddy, I’m not sure if you’re aware but you’re sort of blocking my driveway.”

  I looked past Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky. I wasn’t sort of doing anything. My car was directly in front it, and sitting lopsided, so I was pretty sure at least one of my tires was on the curb.

  I faced forward to start my engine, but before I could complete the task a wave o
f nausea washed over me. Shaky hands fumbled with the door handle then shoved. Mr. Happy-Go-Lucky wouldn’t be so happy once he discovered what’d just come spewing from my mouth at the end of his driveway.

  He knocked on the window again as my stomach lurched a second time then finished emptying itself. “Are you okay, sir? Do you need me to call an ambulance?”

  If he knew the cause of my sickness he’d be calling the cops.

  Once I was sure no more of yesterday’s lunch was coming up, I slammed the door then drove off without another word. My head swam a bit when I paused at the stop sign, a warning that I shouldn’t have been driving. If I remembered correctly, there was a coffee shop not too far from here. I could make it.

  I pulled into a parking spot fifteen minutes later. It was really only a five-minute drive but I’d taken the slow and cautious route.

  I laid my head on the back of my seat and rested my eyes for a minute. I didn’t want to be sober. Sobriety brought with it a painful past that I’d rather forget. But I needed a clear head to figure out where exactly I was headed next. I couldn’t go back to my uncle’s house or my dorm. While my memories were foggy, one thing was clear; Jay wanted nothing to do with me.

  I couldn’t really blame him. My mom didn’t want me. Dad didn’t want me. Hell even the foster system didn’t want me or else they’d have never given me back to her in the first place. I was the mix breed, the mongrel, the mutt. I didn’t belong anywhere if I was being honest with myself.

  I like to think of it as two sides of a coin. There’s black and there’s white. By the rules of society there is no in between. I learned as much growing up. In my hood nobody wanted to be cool with the mixed kid. I was often accused of thinking I was better because of my white daddy. Little did they know all I was to him was a stain on his pristine life. Why else would he have bailed out before I was born?

  Things had somewhat changed in high school. I became a hot commodity. All the girls fawned over the mixed boy with the pretty blue eyes. While I’d had all the ass I could handle, I’d also made a lot of enemies. Guys didn’t take too kindly to the pretty boy stealing their girls. But what can I say? No man in his right mind would’ve said no to all the fine honeys I had lined up at my locker.